Isn’t it all about habits?


Assalamu Alaikum All,
Everyone seems to be in the mindset of setting ibadah goals. I think sometimes we become a bit unrealistic in the goals we set ourselves for Ramadan. A last trick of Shaytaan before he’s locked away perhaps? “Go on”, he whispers. “You know you can read the whole Quran 3 times!” (despite the fact that you have 4 children to tend for and a baby who wakes up three times a night!)
“You can’t pray Qiyam once a week! What kind of a Muslim are you?” he convinces you. “Qiyam every day is the only way!” (even though you’re pregnant and exhausted from all the fatigue and morning sickness”.
So, what am I getting at here? We need to be realistic. Isn’t Ramadan all about setting habits that we can follow through in the next year? What is the point of setting unrealistic goals if all we do is do all of that ibadaah only to do nothing once Ramadan is finished until next Ramadan…of course! How sad.
I think we all need to really be honest about our situations and set realistic goals according to our personal circumstances. Don’t compare yourself to others dear sisters. It isn’t about others. Its about YOU and your LORD. Whilst one sister can read one juz every day, another may find that very difficult. REMEMBER its about our intention behind good deeds that counts and not really the deed itself.
What we should be thinking about is what we can implement this month that we can inshaAllah definitely continue doing on Eid day and thereafter. Its about establishing good habits isn’t it? Yes, we must exert ourselves this month but remember the life of a believer is not just in Ramadan.
I remember listening to a talk once where the speaker noted that if after Ramadan there hasn’t been any differences in our ibaadah, character and habits then really our Ramadan has not been a successful one. However, if after Ramadan we have changed then it is a sign that Allah (Swt) accepted our fasting and worship.
So, sisters what good habits are you going to work on this month that you can continue thereafter? And in the same way, what bad habits are you going to try and eradicate? Don’t let Shaytaan win in his attempt to try and fool you into becoming this amazing abid in Ramadan. Be realistic and then go for it!
May Allah grant us the tawfeeq to really establish good habits this month and get rid of the bad ones that are preventing us from nearing Him. Ameen.
Take care
Umm Raiyaan x


15 responses »

  1. Pingback: Ramadan Readiness for Women and All « Traveler in this World

  2. assalamu alaikum

    i have already started learning surah baqarah so tht i can atleast complete 150 – 200 aayats in ramadan inshAllah

    well the for the bad habit , i ll try to control my toungue n temper n ll try to do zikr .


  3. as salaamu alaykum,

    Again, this was really wonderful..thanks for helping us try to “keep it real,” ma sha Allah!

    (You’re a great writer, alhamdulillah! Love to read your heart to hearts………..)

  4. assa salamu alikum ,,,

    thats absolutly what happens to us in ramadan mashallah jazakillah khair for all ur advises and ideas about getting better in ramadaan and following it inshahllah,,

  5. as salaamu alaykum
    Dear sister, i really love your writing. Thank you for this post, reminding me about what all of this should be : our intention behind good deeds, and relation between us and Allah.
    I am from Indonesia (where Islam is a major religion), and so happy to find other muslimahs blog from country where Islam still become minor religion.
    I also learn a lot about homeschooling here.
    Once again, thank you.
    Jazakallahu khairan katsira.

  6. Salaam, have been blurking for sometime, but need to say thank you to remind me all of this, As I feel sometime so guilty by not doing the “super” ibadah 🙂

  7. Salam alaykum sister,
    I really love your blog-it’s a great resource mashallah. I only have 2 children-one is a 1 yr old who gets up a lot at night and leaves me very exhausted. I find that I am doing an awful job w/ spending time w/my 5 year old and following through on my teaching goals for her. How do u manage? Any tips?

    • Ws wr wb

      Jzk for your kind comment sis. Click on the planning and organisation tab on my blog which will lead you to some posts about how I manage! Sometimes though, I do fall apart! lol

  8. Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu. Masha’Allah! Jazaki’Allahu khayran for such a down-to-earth reminder. I just started completing something called the Heart Wheel Journal by Imam Muhammad Al Shareef which I find really helpful because it helps you track your own personal Ibadah progress and spiritual development based on your own individual circumstances. Highly recommend it. xxx

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